I was a terrible teen. Now my son is turning into one, karma is coming for me | Polly Hudson

loaded adjectives: Describing preteens as 'nice' implies teens are not nice, creating a negative contrast.

“This is the very last year my little boy will be nice and preteen”

fear appeal: The repeated 'Tick tock, tick tock!' creates a sense of urgency and impending doom about the child's aging.

“Tick tock, tick tock!”

narrative framing: Frames adolescence as inherently negative by contrasting it with the 'nice' preteen stage, omitting positive aspects of teen development.

“This is the very last year my little boy will be nice and preteen”

loaded adjectives: Describing future decisions as 'dumb' frames teen behavior negatively despite citing scientific authority.

“in the future my son’s going to make dumb decisions”

vague attribution: Refers to 'a professor' and 'Dr Evelyn Svingen' without providing a source for the quoted material or context for her expertise in relation to teen brain development.

“according to Dr Evelyn Svingen, assistant professor of criminology at the University of Birmingham”

loaded labels: Calling herself 'the most terrible teenager who has ever stomped across the earth' uses hyperbolic, self-deprecating language that frames adolescence as inherently extreme and negative.

“I was the most terrible teenager who has ever stomped across the earth”

sensationalism: The dramatic description of transformation with 'sky went black' and 'ominous clap of thunder' uses theatrical imagery to exaggerate the normal transition into adolescence.

“The sky went black, there was an ominous clap of thunder”

narrative framing: Frames adolescence as a sudden, dramatic fall from grace, ignoring gradual development and positive aspects of growing up.

“I went up to bed on the eve of my 13th birthday a delightful angel... The next morning, I had transformed into the princess of darkness”

loaded adjectives: Describing past choices as 'stupid' reinforces a negative view of typical teen behavior despite the scientific framing.

“I made every stupid choice going”

sympathy appeal: Invokes personal grief and loss to create emotional resonance, potentially manipulating reader empathy.

“The irony that now, 14 years after his death, I would give almost anything to walk down a road with him is not lost on me”

loaded verbs: Using 'eye-rolling like Trinny and Susannah' caricatures teen behavior as dismissive and disrespectful.

“the next lagging behind him and eye-rolling like Trinny and Susannah”

loaded labels: Describing the normal developmental stage as a 'descent into teenagerdom' frames it as a negative decline.

“His descent into teenagerdom has already started”

humor appeal: Uses self-deprecating humor about being 'mortified' by a child's normal social awareness to soften but still emphasize parental embarrassment.

“he was mortified by the idea, in case any of his schoolfriends were around”

fear appeal: Repeats 'Tick tock, tick tock' to maintain a sense of anxiety about time passing and loss of control.

“Tick tock, tick tock.”